Why this aversion to selling?
Having run workshops with women all over the world on this topic, I can confirm that the results are always the same – the way people feel and the emotional reaction it evokes is undoubtedly where the problem resides. When I ask groups how the prospect of promoting themselves feels, I’ll be met with words like awkward, arrogant, embarrassing, unnatural and cringe to name but a few.
There are many reasons why it might feel uncomfortable to promote yourself which may include the fact that you’ve never consciously had to do it before, maybe you’ve not given much thought to how you want to come across nor have you spent time crafting a powerful message. If you don’t know how to clearly communicate ‘who you are’, if you don’t know which bit of your story to tell and you have never practised ways of telling it, of course, you’re not going to feel confident about it… I don’t know many people who would!
When it comes to interviews, salary increases, promotions, winning new clients, partnerships, collaborations and all that could appear on the career and business path ahead of you, you won’t be able to help people unless they actually work with you – which means, at some point, you’ll need to sell yourself!
By re-framing how you view ‘selling’ and understanding the value it has – to you, your career or business – will help you get more comfortable with the idea and this, in turn, will hopefully lead to you becoming more interested in learning how you can get better at it.
Rather than focus on how ‘selling’ makes you feel, shift your attention to what it would mean for you? For your family? For your wellbeing? For your career or business?
What if being able to promote yourself resulted in earning an extra £50k each year? What if strategic positioning saw you landing 5 new clients? What if your negotiation skills improved because you knew your value and weren’t happy to downplay it? You get the idea…
If this was your reality, you could have more time, money and control.
The ‘selling’ hack
I’m going straight in with the self-promotion hack here because there is an easy way! By crafting, building and growing an authentic personal brand, it will do a lot of the ‘selling’ for you.
A personal brand encompasses everything centred around you and your public image – on paper, on the internet, and in person. Loosely defined, it is a way of establishing and consistently reinforcing who you are and what you stand for in your life and in your career.
Personal branding isn’t about puffing up your ego, showing off or boasting, essentially, it’s your shop window – the thing that creates the pull; making people stop and take a closer look. A good window display will draw people in so imagine yourself as the owner of a shop called ‘YOU’ on a bustling street. Would you refrain from putting your wares on display in the shop window for fear that potential customers walking past might think you were showing off? Would you allocate your time to quietly working away in the stock room whilst leaving the window display empty in the hope that someone would come in to find out more? No, of course you wouldn’t!
If you are this metaphorical shop and your online presence (as well as your offline appearances at events, meetings… anywhere really) is your shop window – are you happy with how it looks? Does it accurately represent what’s going on inside? Does it attract aligned people and opportunities?
Hopefully you’re starting to come around to the idea that selling can be both valuable and meaningful to you – personally and professionally – and by spending some time thinking about your shop window, you’ll be taking the first steps towards crafting your personal brand.
Yes, a strong personal brand can do the hard work for you but that certainly doesn’t happen overnight and maybe you’re not there yet so if you’re still feeling a little reluctant (and icky-cringe), I’ll leave you with 3 tips on how to get started.
By getting comfortable with selling, you can create enormous value for yourself, your career and your future so it’s never too soon to start!
Want to learn more?
I will be running a personal branding workshop with Found & Flourish on the 6th September where I will be coaching you through all of the above and more!
You will learn:
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